We had moved out of my grandmother's house and my mother and I were living in a unit, it was new and had a courtyard and garage. I had no inclination toward women's clothing for any reason for many years until one day I was putting on some roller skates, I had an odd feeling about the way the straps looked and how the were similar to a ladies sandal. I had a wave of compelling feelings come over me, my mother wasn't home and knew she wouldn't be for some hours, I wondered what it would feel like to put on her stockings and shoes and I needed to find out straight away. I went to her bedroom and took off my clothes and then opened her wardrobe, I found a bag full of pantyhose, all of them tan in color, and then under her bed I selected a pair of high heel sandals, also tan. I had seen my mother put on pantyhose many times and I had no difficulty in pulling them on, however, I did have trouble understanding the strange but wonderful feeling the hosiery gave me. To this day, there is. Jeff and his wife Marlene had been our next door neighbors until they moved out to Bakersfield when I was 5. My brother Robert and I used to play with his children. Walking closer I hugged him. ‘Well it’s me. How have you been? How are Marlene and the kids doing?’ Jeff pulled back and I saw the pain in his eyes before he covered it with a smile. ‘Marlene died of cancer 4 years ago. Kelly is living back east with her husband who is in the air force and I haven’t talked to Eric in over 5 years. I don’t know where he is.’ I rested my hand on his shoulder. ‘Oh Jeff, I’m sorry.’ He smiled at me. ‘It’s okay. So what have you been up to? Your mom says she hasn’t seen or heard from you in over seven years, since you got sent to foster care and drug rehab.’ I pulled away from him and started walking back to the car. ‘Yea well I decided that I needed to start a new life. So I did.’ I smiled at him as he walked beside me. ‘So what are you doing here?’ From the blush he had on his face, I knew.
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